Mystery...

He is quite the loving father. His family is a rather strange one. He enjoys spending time with his best friend which also happens to be his dog. He loves everyone in his family except for his daughter, but no one likes her, she is the black sheep of the family. He is not very smart,he is legally retarded, some would even say he is "petarded". He loves sitting in front of the television and challenging his two sons and dog to an "ipecac" drinking competition, to compete for the last piece of pie. Only to realize that it was a terrible idea in the first place. He has been known to grow a beard and let a family of endangered birds live in his beard until they are ready to leave. He also loves to make stupid jokes and he is always wearing the same green pants and white button up oxford. It is the look of champions. Some would say he is quite the family guy...